Sunday, February 28, 2010


A minor glitch occurred during the opening ceremonies for this years Winter Olympics. It appears one of the arms for the Olympic flame malfunctioned and caused a slight delay. So what do they do about it? Simple, they incorporate it into their closing ceremonies and made it a comedy routine. In other words, they were able to laugh it off, and poke a little fun at themselves.

Now if this incident had occurred in the United States, FOX, CNN and MSNBC news channels would be tripping over each other to see who would garner the most experts, to give their versions on how something like this could have occurred. Every person in the stadium would be interviewed, as to how their lives were dramatically damaged forever by this event. Lawyers would be scrambling to see who would be the first to file the thousands of lawsuits, that would be sure to follow.

Congress would try to calm a distraught nation by having hearings in both houses to access blame. The reverends Al and Jesse would work to find a racial aspect to the incident to get their few minutes of TV time. All the other made for TV reverends, would be telling us how God had caused the arm to malfunction, to punish the Olympics, for allowing gays to participate.

Thousands of books would be written as everyone from aliens to terrorists would be blamed for the few minutes delay. Conspiracy groups would claim government cover ups; forcing the president to call for an independent investigative body, all to squelch all the rumors that were spreading via the Internet.

Rush and Beck would be screaming at the top of their lungs blaming the president and the democratic party. While at the Huffington Post, the blame would be laid at the feet of Bush and Cheney, with claims that the malfunction was inherited from the previous administration.

The only thing good that would come out of all of this is that South Park would be able to air a few episodes of this disastrous situation.

I apologize to all the people that I omitted that would get their five minutes of fame, by making ludicrous claims, on why and how it happened.

Thank you Canada for showing us how adults handle minor calamities.

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